Friday, February 8, 2013

Looking Back While Moving Forward

I hope that my Friday Eve amused you. I think life was getting just way too serious and some much needed laughter needed to be rekindled. Life is just too damn short to let all the morose that we deal with overwhelm us. I for one am celebrating the arrival of the weekend. This night it will be a sort of non-pasta lasagna using chicken thighs and broccoli with a tomato garlic sauce and cheese. We shall see if this works out or is a one off experiment. Trying to get the rest of the meats in the freezer used up in order to restock. So often I keep adding and adding and it just gets to the point of what the heck do I have in there? So now I am getting down to about another week of creative cooking and then we shall start over.

A friend of mine is up to his eyeballs in getting the directory made for the upcoming Faerie gathering at Breitenbush. This is what spurred my subject line this day. As I was reading about his trials and tribulations it made me think back to how important it was to me to go up there year after year in the winter and summer. I did it for nearly 10 years I believe. I have wonderful memories and at times I do think of returning. In fact, I am slated to host next winter, but will be removing myself from that in that there is something even more enthralling to me happening at the time - the Winter Olympics. But that is not what I am focusing on, it is that life changes and times move forward. A lot of what I cherish of Breitenbush is no longer there and yet at the same time so many of the wonderful men I have met over the years still play a major roll in my life. But there is no longer a calling or a need to return. Perhaps in the future I will return, but for now I am quite content to reflect on the past and the fun times that were had. At the same time I know the as I move forward there is so much to be found and explored.

It is in the simple tasks of life that new found direction is achieved. It brought Damon into my life and now in May I will be speaking at the Swedish Nurses conference about my time in the hospital last year. There are the constant challenges of making progress and moving forward with my life that was not so guaranteed in the past. Granted, much like the Governor in New Jersey who is dealing with weight issues, it is a never ending struggle. But one that is never completely lost in that we can always begin again. It is knowing that the days of having Mom in my life are coming to a close, at some point, but I have to really now only rely on the past for the memories that are so magical. There is the anticipation of a new work situation in my future as I see my time finally coming to a close at E&A after 15+ years. Scary, and yet exciting at the same time. So during this month of reflection that I see February as being, it is stunning to see how far I have come and yet oh what possibilities lay before me.

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