Sunday Slumberday

There is something to be said for not having to be anywhere at anytime in particular.  Sunday mornings always seems to kick off with a pot of coffee and watching "CBS Sunday Morning with Charles Osgood" and this has been a staple for years.  Every other week Moonsong often arrives shortly thereafter to clean, but not this day.  So instead, I got up and did the laundry and vacuumed a bit and then made something that I fund to be quite tasty.  I had begun growing bored with the ritual of bacon and eggs on Sunday with cheese on the scrambled eggs.  Mind you, I love bacon, but I was craving something different.  Well, it happened, I sauteed some chopped Spanish onions and then cooked up 12 oz. of pork sausage and combined with eggs to create a scramble that was so delicious I was in heaven and it was filling too.  Quite satisfied I took my remaining coffee and made my way into the living area and watched it rain a bit and then made a few calls to friends, some home and others I left voicemail.  Never quite got back to the phone as a book drew my attention only to be interrupted by a light lunch of a couple of Hebrew National hot dogs and a lovely salad with blue cheese dressing and grape tomatoes with cheese and cucumber.  Quite fun.  A nap called my name and I replied.  A true joy of the weekend.  But all this still could not shake what happened on Friday.

I was driving to work and going up Dearborn and saw the police pulling a tarp over a body. It was not pleasant in any way shape or form. It was not until driving home that afternoon that I finally realized it had been a suicide. It really, really impacted me in a way I totally disconnected for the weekend. I did not use the computer and in fact, when I saw Jodie and Rob they told me how I looked more than a bit disconnected. Perhaps I was.  It haunted me for a couple of days and even in typing this I see how emotional it was to me.  What makes a person go to that level of complete and utter finality?  I know that there are those that deal with this and perhaps that is why I was so enthralled with "In Her Shoes" yesterday in that the mother of the two sisters killed herself.  It such a statement of finality and there is no turning back.  In a weird way, I look back to last year and realize how much has happened since my time in the hospital - mind you I was not trying to kill myself, but I did shave it close a couple of times, it makes you cherish the memories all the more and the times we have.  It makes so much of what we do and go through seem so small by comparison.